Last week I was in an awkward conversation where a woman said, “She’s one of those Angry Feminist types, you know?” and I couldn’t pull the lady to the side for an explanation. Was she upset about someone wanting gender equality or was she surprised that in this day and age someone who wants gender equality is angry?
Because it’s really hard not to be angry right now.
Women are constantly beaten by a barrage of media insisting we ought to sit down, shut up, and smile. Most recently we watched the only woman in the running for presidency get told by newscasters to “stop yelling and smile.” The woman is running for president of the United State, not Miss America. No one wants a national leader who will shut up and smile, but judging from the voter turn out there are a lot of us who would like a woman as president.
Women who write often find their books sidelined. Award-winning MG author Shannon Hale has a long list of schools where she went for a book reading and only the girls were excused from classes. Because she’s a “Girl Author” whose books have both male and female characters, but written by a woman, so the boys were told not to attend. Not to listen. Not to read. Of course she’s angry! Wouldn’t you be?
I’ve walked down the aisle at the local Brick ‘n Mortar bookstore, seen a man debating over books, talked shop with him, and had him say, “Oh, I don’t read books by girls. They don’t know how to write.” TO MY FACE. MULTIPLE TIMES. MULTIPLE PEOPLE. Of course I’m angry.
I’m raising daughters who are taught in school to wear more clothes because bare shoulders might distract the boys or invite someone to rape them. INVITE SOMEONE TO RAPE THEM. Let that sink in. Rape is a non-consensual physical assault. By definition, you cannot INVITE someone to do something non-consensual. Inviting implies consent. The boys aren’t being told, “Don’t touch unless you have permission.” The girls are being taught, “Shut up. Sit down. Smile. Or you will be hurt and it will be your fault.” Of course I’m angry!
Who wouldn’t be angry in a climate where women are still pushing to be recognized and treated equally to men.
Feminism isn’t just for women. Gender equality means men get treated equally; with the right to have emotions, pick “traditionally female” jobs, raise children, ect. Feminism means other non-binary genders or trangendered people get treated like people, fully accepted and protected by law. Feminism doesn’t mean White Feminism only protecting the wealthy elite, but it means equality for everyone of every color, race, creed, religion, gender, and type.
And, yes, it makes me angry when I see people trashed and abused and ignored because of their gender. I hate how the media will rip apart a woman’s clothing when she’s discussing foreign policy but not say word one about the man across from her who looks like he woke up after a sleeping on a bus for six hours. I’m upset when women are told they need to calm down but men can spray spittle over the cameras as they talk about arresting thousands of people based on their religion alone.
I believe in equality and free choice. I have the right to believe what I believe, and so does everyone else. And if being angry is the only way to change the world so that everyone has a fair shot and is treated equally, than angry it is. I’ve tried calm. I’ve tried logic. I’ve tried science. I’ve tried stats. Hate is never good. Gender-based hate is always harmful to a society. So, yeah, I am a feminist and I am angry. You should be too.